"Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us." Romans 5:1-5
To say I was more than a little curious about the transition back into "my life" is an understatement. Jamie and I had several conversations about reverse culture shock and (my) expectations that people genuinely want to know what's going on in Haiti. Another friend suggested that I have a two-minute version because that's all most people want to hear. And before this trip, my attention span might have been about the same for someone with a similar experience.
That was before it was real.
I know the children of Maison de Lumiere. I know their faces and stories; I close my eyes and I can hear their voices. I spent five weeks watching them praise God with honor and glory, totally unashamed. Yes, it's the same God that I worship, but the spiritual richness I felt in Haiti is something I haven't felt here in America.
I know that I am blessed with living in a country where I am afforded a myriad of opportunities. I work hard as a teacher in order to maintain a certain lifestyle, and I don't feel guilty about anything I have. I will admit that I have been caught up in the pursuit of stuff and allowed my spirituality to take a backseat to the accumulation of material possessions and other seemingly important things. In Haiti, there is no pursuit of stuff. It's the pursuit of God and His Kingdom.
Haiti has suffered as a country and they continue to suffer. Yes, there's an upcoming election, but the country has a long history of corruption that will take generations to change. Because of this suffering, these people have developed perseverance, character, and hope. The kids at MdL may have lost mothers and fathers and any normal semblance of family, but they have a trust in God that inspires. When you have nothing, you have nothing to lose.
I took a huge leap of faith this summer in (completely) stepping out of my comfort zone. I left behind family and friends and gave up my vacation for the unknown. And while I would like to take credit for any of it, I know that it wasn't my decision or plan at all. I think about all the experiences in my life that have been preparing me for Haiti, and it's no coincidence that they all came together so perfectly.
And the transition back into "my life"? I don't feel the need to rush around, and relationships are more important than ever. I haven't found any reason to go to Target, and I probably went to Target 6 times before leaving for Haiti. I feel a peace and calmness in my life that wasn't there before, and I feel my faith is stronger than ever.
I've heard from many people who followed my blog, and it's an honor to know that so many took the time to read about my experience. Thank you from the bottom of my heart! If you are interested in learning more about what Child Hope is doing in the lives of these precious children, you can follow their updates or support their ministry at http://www.childhope.org/
I don't know what happens next, and that's the beauty of trusting God. I do know that life will never be quite the same, and I'm okay with that.
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